As most significant life events, it wasn't planned but was a result of a situation -- a coincidence if you may. My bestfriend was coming home to the Philippines for Christmas in 2014 and wanted to make time for a beach trip. It just turned out that my birthday weekend was the most ideal for both our schedules. So we decided on a location, made minimal plans, and pushed through even with an impending storm. After that trip, I realized that that's what I want to do every year.
The first year
In 2014, I went to a surfing town called Baler with my high school bestfriend who now lives in London and whom I see every couple of years but frequently talk with. Apart from the first night's accommodation and travel directions, we didn't really plan for anything else. We stayed along Sabang beach, the main tourist area, at a cheap lodging I found online and made plans as hours went by, which included an afternoon nap, a surfing session, bicycle-hunting, and a DIY tour. It was both our first time in the area (and our first time travelling together) so there were lots of things to be excited about.On the morning of my birthday, we woke up early to catch the sunrise, strolling along the dark empty beach and staring meditatively out at the sea (well I did). The wind blew strong, the clouds threatened with rain, and the sun failed to display itself. Nevertheless, I felt good being up and about early enough and being with good company. On the way back to our lodge, we were drawn to a small local bakery by the smell of baked goods. We decided to buy mini-cupcakes and mini-candles with which she and our lodge neighbors sang happy birthday to me.
At dinner, I received my second birthday song when the restaurant staff surprised us with a free birthday dessert of turon ala mode. We were having dinner with our lodge neighbor, Miles, a surfer from California who had a semi-handlebar mustache and who talked about waves travelling for miles and miles before crashing down on a beach and how amazing it is for a surfer to catch that energy. I was actually very tired and zoning in and out of the conversation so I was in a dream-like state when the staff came out singing loudly with a candle to blow out.
As I don't normally get two birthday candles and birthday songs when celebrating in the city, this boded well for my first out-of-town celebration.
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| I always find myself staring out at the sea whenever faced by it |
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The succeeding years
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| A hand-made birhday cake |
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| Towards the end of our 2nd 7-hour drive, we stopped at Bangui in pitch-black darkness beneath a star-studded and gas-clouded night sky while the gigantic windmills loudly burred in the background. |
In 2016, I went on a weekend trip to Pundaquit, Zambales with a college blockmate whom I always make time to bond with. I invited her to come away with me, wanting to have company and to catch up with her. We boarded a bus at Kamias, transferred to another one at Olongapo, chartered a tricycle at San Antonio, and walked 100m along the beach to our almost-private beach cottage. The following night, we waited for December 5 with drinks on the table, just talking and sharing stories, switching between life, love, and laughs. The waves rolled by, stars faded in and out, and rain showered softly throughout midnight before we decided to turn in. There was neither cake nor song and it didn't feel celebratory but it was the best I could hope for.
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| We found ourselves beside a fishing village that thrives on both fish catch and island-hopper traffic. The vibe was the opposite of party but it was a good venue for escaping internal and external noise. |
The previous year
This 2017 felt quite different as I have been living in an island for a month prior with my old man (not referring to my dad but he does act like my dad at times). There was no beach escape to plan and no friend to anticipate. Also, unlike the previous years, I was quite busy with work and couldn't afford a full-day celebration. Nevertheless, I was at the beach, gazing at the sunset, without an ensuing back-to-the-city trip.
I spent the morning doing as much work as I can focus on before slipping into a dress I specifically brought for this day and discreetly slipping out of the house. I daintily hopped onto the back of a motorcycle and rushed to the dive center, hoping to catch my freedive buddies and share with them the birthday Mango Float cake I hastily made the previous night. They happily greeted me and the four of us enjoyed my homemade cake (the only food I am confident enough to feed to other people). Afterwards, me and my old man sat by the beach just in time for sunset during which I started telling him about my previous birthday celebrations and how different the year's celebration felt. Shortly after, he excused himself to dress for dinner so I was able to enjoy my cocktails, online birthday greetings and brief chats with old friends.
With the absence of travel, my celebratory plan was to get drunk on happy hour cocktails and laugh the night away. It wasn't the best idea or a mature one and maybe I should stick with discovering a new beach the next time.
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Now that I am no longer basing myself in the city, situations similar to 2017's will likely become more normal...and that's a good thing. Though my celebrations don't come with a blast and a lot of excitement, it is what feels right and meaningful. However, I still don't recommend completely isolating yourself on the day when you want to feel loved.
